Thursday, December 30, 2010

oh the pain...

My body hates me.  Everything hurts... stiff, achy, acute weird pains even. Congested and draining.  I awoke this morning with very puffy swollen eyes and face. 
just the truth.

I did not intend to express any regrets about my choices this holiday.  I have eaten freely of things I 'do not eat', vaguely trying at meal times to make moderately good choices.  But often I made blatantly poor ones for the sake of vacation, family, relaxing, being 'out of my element'...
My belly doesn't swell up and bloat so obviously; my digestion seems good to me.  I don't believe myself to be gluten or lactose intolerant. But I. FEEL. AWFUL.

Knowing that I was hitting the rum cake and cookies pretty hard, I was determined to hit WOD's reasonably hard as well... I mean I'm not trying to completely let go, and besides a new gym/new people - enticement to put up respectable efforts.
I had a few PR's on weightlifting this week, but I'm paying for it. My recovery is ... absent.

Sigh... it is obvious to me that I am a sugar junkie, and I'm far off the wagon. Rehab will commence soon, but not soon enough.  Why do I crave and almost compulsively munch at things that are clearly destroying me, and am SO happy to do it?  Friends, I ask this repeatedly.  The answer is we are in a fallen world and we have to fight for everything true, good, beautiful... and healthy! Lord, help me. I'm reaping my just reward now.  My body has no strength but I'm re-awakening.  I still want beer!  I still want beans and cake and wine and peanut butter balls and pizza! Even as I feel like death.

A new year is coming- renewed strength of will.  This was both fun and not - time to move on.
But I pray I remember this clearly so I won't be so arrogant at my next 'break'.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Family Fun

ah. nothing like being home for the holidays...

hung my rings from a tree.... if I could muscle up they would be helpful there.  The brothers gave me a boost to get some dips in.
taken by Mike... check out

We did some pseudo yoga diving pushup stretching in the yard... good times, then had a grappling match in our Christmas Eve fancy clothes. Mom called the match off, but I think judges would conclude Mike's victory.
My brother Chris tried to teach me some Tai Chi...  observe me not following  ->

And of course there is playing with the children and the 30's of Christmas time conditioning as my commitment for another 2 weeks.  I can get them in together... squats with the babies.

These have been nice little breaks from my perpetual indulgence ... the list of which is topped with RUM CAKE!  I did hit a mild sugar coma Christmas Eve, but doing better.

Being with family is a good stabilizer.  Life is what it is, but most of all it's worth living.  There is more beer to come for me! Hopefully I can drop in on the local crossfit Monday and gladly take the just recompense for my choices.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Week's Activity & Braving the Elements

Here in Southern California we are quite spoiled with temperate weather... So when it has been dumping rain for days what's a girl to do?  Get out and play of course!  Right... I'm usually Little Miss Adventure, but this weekend I had no desire for that.  Effort and Committment - that's the best I got right now... In the words of Holly would if she could... Show up and Try hard. 

Friday Rest Day! Appointments, dinner and fun with an old friend. and I did not get my own WOD in.
Good thing I have Christmas time conditioning as my insurance- I can relax as my schedule fluctuates all over the place and at least squeeze that in everyday.

Saturday 3 rounds, 10 weighted pullups (~18lbs) + 30 Back extensions = 5:33  woohoo. 1st two rounds pullups unbroken.  For some extra conditioning tabata wall balls 10lbs = lowest count 8 or 10. I forgot.

Sunday   The rain came and I chose a workout that would let me stay inside- 3 rounds: 15 hang power cleans, 15 burpees... Rx was 105 for ladies, but I, not so gracefully, managed 95 lbs.  This really is not much fun to do alone, but I did it. 14:20

This is what a hang power clean should look like. 

Mine were something between this and catching the bar in a squat, which is the problem... need to work on my squat flexibility.

Monday:  The rain continues.  The Pull up bar is outside.  Oh well, Quite fun pulling this one off. AMRAP in 20 min: 5 chest to bar pullups, 10 ring dips, 15 Overhead Squats (65 lbs) = 4 rounds + 5 pullups. 
AND a break through... This is so embarassing, but sometimes when doing pullups I feel like I am about to pee my pants. Seriously, it's this uncomfortable feeling that my insides are about to explode.  It freaks me out.  Once it happened during "death by pullups" - after doing the peepee dance for a while (to crazy sideways glances I got from my wod buddies) I ran to the bathroom... only to find I didn't really have to go!
Monday I had this same awful sensation with the ring dips... but break through because:
1) I did not pee myself  - that's my fear when I feel like I'm about to ya know!
2) I mastered the sensation and was able to rise above it and finish my workout.  It was a minor victory to stop the freak out in my head, and to realize it's just a strange feeling my body makes that I can push through.

Tuesday:  Still raining! Fortunately for me today was inside - Back Squat Day!  I love back squats (as long as no one tries to spot me - Dear Lord, I hope that never happens again.)  And I hit a PR!  190lbs easy peasy!
I am hopeful about this lift that I will be able to raise that number quite a bit.  (shoulder press and deadlift... eh, not so much.)

Wednesday and following:  Yes Still raining.... I'm catching a red eye tonight, but I hope I will be able to let Brian run me through a WOD before I go.  Once I land in Sweet Home Alabama I'm in unfamiliar work out waters.  In my family our exercise consists mostly of getting from the couch to the dining room table and back ;)  And really that's a little bit what the holidays are about... just being together.  So I'm going to try not to be TOO anal, just get something in most days so I don't get grumpy.

Planning for the Journey:
1) Packed the RINGS and the JUMPROPE.  Hours of entertainment right there.  Need to work handstand pushups and pistol squats as well and that doesn't require equipment.

2) Found out the time to join a local running group... hope to make a 10k distance.

3) Will drop in at the local crossfit and hope they are friendly.  Thus far no response to my messages.

4)  PLAYING with my nieces and nephew... that's good cardio.

5) There's always the YMCA ;)

Monday, December 20, 2010

Christmas Simplicity

I think I must just be spoiled rotten, but this is the simplest Christmas ever.

1)  Baking - Maybe food is so much of the holiday spirit: baking and such.  Of which I have done none. I don't need the temptation and I'm sure the people I might make things for will get plenty of junk food from other sources.

2) Gifts - My sister has single handedly managed all of my family shopping.  She loves to shop and may have over done her budget. So I took the opportunity to simplify my life, help my budget and hers by buying gifts off her.  Awesome.  I don't have to shop, I don't have to worry about transport of said gifts.  I just show up, write her a check, do some wrapping and Voila!  Done... Stress avoided, Spirit of the Season preserved with focus on family time.

3) Decorating - Ok it IS a little depressing, but I live in my office.  If I were going to be here for Christmas then maybe I would have bought a tree and made it more festive, because I love a place that is warm and inviting, but I'm not going to be here. and  Let me add to this that in my grown up single life I have lived in at least 10 different places and had probably more than double that number of roommates...  I have shopped for decorations many times, received countless ornaments from students and friends, and I don't think a single item of Christmas decor has made the journey with me to this place.  I am sorry, but I am happy not to spend money on decorations once again that will inevitably get left behind in yet another move.
So YAY for me, one more way to simplify Christmas in my life this year.
The only decoration I made was my Advent "Wreath" (and even that came out of things I already had in my decor with the exception of the candles.)

A little light to remind me that Christ the light was born so that I may have life.  The candles remind me that there is hope.

I dare not hope that your Christmas preparations have been so easy, but I hope you have found peace and meaning in all the things you have chosen to take on.  In all the frustration of family, and impatience while shopping, and exhaustion in cooking and cleaning.... please remember how much you love the people you are doing all this for, and remember how much they LOVE YOU!  If something doesn't get done... who cares?!  They want your health, happiness, and quality time most.

So my friends, I pray we will each be kind to ourselves and others in the days ahead, taking time for quiet and gratitude for just how much we are loved, starting with sweet baby Jesus. all "8 lb 6 oz, in his golden fleece diapers, playing with his baby einstein mobile" - take some time to thank Him and to love Him.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Randomness & Alexander the Great

When you set out to conquer (achieve is a better word for our culture) do you question, why?  Do you weigh out all the reasons and desires with your head and heart and prayerfully consider, "Is this a worthy conquest?"

I do, but not faithfully.  Sometimes I just want to conquer.  I want to triumph. I don't want to count the cost or the worth of it. I just want the victory!  Charming.  Valiant.  Impressive. And Foolish.

Over and over. I have done this. Some times I succeed and that's great for a moment, and sometimes fear creates my failure and gives way to shame.

Alexander the Great.  Great for his massive conquest - which would have been even more massive if his troops hadn't rebelled.  He held it together; his whole life conquering more and more, but he died far from home, only to have his empire divided by civil war within a relatively few short years of his death.

He "conquered the world". Would he have ever been satisfied?  Was there a vision?  Was there a purpose other than his own glory?  Sure, he spread Greek culture which was a legacy for the areas he conquered in life.  They gained something from it I'm sure.  But why did he do it?  From eternity, would he count it worth it?  Does he regret not having loved more? Not having lived a peaceful life and happy life in ensuring the prosperity of the already strong nation he had inherited from his father? It was strong. It was beautiful. Ultimately, was he happy?

And Me. I am not Alexander the Great.  I self sabotage and bolt in the face of potential "failure".

Except when I don't.

I am a stubborn and determined girl.  I'm not particularly talented.  Seriously. I'm not being humble; it's true.  There is no prodigy about me. But I have loads of passion and life.  I work hard - I do.  I pour my poor little heart into life so much that I so often FEEL completely passionless and lifeless and loss of all motivation.  Conquering, or Striving,  and never satisfied. It's never enough for me.

ENOUGH.  I say it's enough now. I'm tired of being a sieve with all the beauty and joy spilling right through me... others see it in me but I don't feel it, own it, live it.  It's time to be a reservoir.

"If you are wise, you will show yourself rather as a reservoir than as a canal.  A canal spreads abroad water as it receives it, but a reservoir waits until it is filled before overflowing, and thus without loss to itself it shares its superabundant water" - St. Bernard of Clairvoux

What does this have to do with Alexander the Great?  I don't know really, probably it's not a real correlation at all, it's just something about conquering for conquering's sake and never being satisfied... someone told me I had an Alexander the Great complex and it led me to these musings here.

If I will shift and live full - not letting my peace and joy pour out from the bottom but over flow from the top - then maybe I can continue to bless others, to triumph, to suceed, and to LIVE fully and freely without fear of the fallout from within.

If I will be triumphant I want it to be for true glory, from my fullness not my grasping.

I hope you are living fully today... soaking in everything about your life and journey that is beautiful, noble, and true... and sitting with it... FULL. grateful, joyful, peaceful, bountiful.   It can't help but overflow and others will be better for it too.

Week's Activity with Travels

Yes, I've still been at it. Refreshed to be back in my happy place, my original crossfit box, CF rio rancho.
That's where the magic began ;)
Thursday= nada flight to Nuevo Mexico

Friday = Skill work Clean and Jerk sets of three at 75,80,85,90,95 and... 3 round 250m run +12 DB thrusters (30lbs) in 6:09

I loved loved loved being back with my old wod buddies.  Vanessa and Melanie kick @#$ and inspire me, so I'm humbled that I can push and inspire them too.  Excitement overtakes reality because I finished this WOD 1st even though I went from sea level to 5,500 ft.

Saturday= Team WOD each team member completes 30 deadlifts, 30 boxjumps, 30 Kettle bell swings, 30 burpees... no one moves on from their station until the whole team is finished their work.  One person had to wear body armor throughout. At the end we relayed 100m farmer's walk each (carrying 53lb kettlebells).
My team finished first again - I'm not competitive.  I was so surprised that the farmer's walk was so hard... maybe I've just never carried that much before.
Pics of lifts never show off a pretty face.
Right. There are no pretty faces while lifting.

Sunday & Monday Rest and Enjoy Vacation - Eat, drink, be merry. Come home and reset.

Tuesday = 10-5-3-2-1-1 Shoulder press at lbs-45,55,65,75,80,85 then 3 rounds: 10 deadlifts + 30 GHD situps = 5:50 
My over eagerness at CFRR caught up with me, coupled with too much sitting on a plane and driving, leaving my back not so great... so only 45lbs on the DL's

Wednesday = 30 burpees and 100 double unders bookmarking this shoulder-centric WOD: Standing Press 1-1-1 (max 80), PushPress 3-3-3 (max 105), PushJerk 5-5-5 (max 110)
Then all together twice SP1, PP3, PJ5.... 75 & 85 lbs.

Begin 30 day challenge... 

Thursday = will be weighted pullups and back extensions. but my hands are feeling quite blistered and bruised for some reason ... so we'll see how I pull this together.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Christmas Time Conditioning

It's possible most of us will partake of some treats this season that are less than optimal for health, fitness, and performance (or perhaps we already have).

Here's an easy challenge for a little extra conditioning.
For the next 30 days add 
30 situps, 30 pushups, and 30 squats each day 
to your regular routine.

Break them up if you need to, but get them in.  Your body will thank you later.

Ready. Go!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Cuppa Tea with Love

I have made the switch.  I actually love my morning tea.  6 months ago,  I could not imagine life without daily lattes or flavored creamers.  6 weeks ago, I couldn't imagine facing a morning without coffee and coconut milk, bitter sweetness.  Now I have done it; I love herbal tea.  THIS one in particular is my most recent delight.

It's spicy sweet and has freed me of needing coconut milk or sweeteners as well. Awesome. 

Me living Caffeine Free = 
End times must be near or We are in an Alternate Universe. 
My mind is blown

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Roasted Delightfulness

Peel and dice:
1 Butternut squash
1-2 Sweet potatoes

(I never chopped a butternut squash, I don't know why I was surprised to see it look like this inside...)

Toss pieces with EVOO or oil of choice.
Lay out on a baking sheet.

Bake on 400 about 25 min.
(Next time I'm trying 350 for 35-40min)

Mmm... Enjoy!

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Half Week's Workouts

21-18-15-12-9 Snatch(65lb not 115lb), Wallballs (14 not 20lbs), Knees to Elbows =  25:09  

I haven't done wallballs in a long time.  I really struggled to get the rythym of them on the 1st two sets.  Thought I gave myself a black eye for a short time there.  But alas, I am resilient.
I broke up the 1st three rounds quite a bit, but no all out stops between the round of 12 wallballs and the end. 
This is the first time I have ever snatched in a WOD.  I'm happy with 65lbs for this amount of reps. I should be! My one rep max is only 85 lbs.
My snatch form was probably not great throughout, but there were several short sets of the snatches that I felt really strong - where my mental game was zoned in, focused and positive.

Tuesday sore, sore, so sore. Good news- my lower back does not feel too sketchy; it's my arms and my neck and buttcheeks.  Today, quick lunch workout. 
4 rounds: hill run 200m, 25 squats, 15 V-ups = 8:50

Wednesday 3 rounds: 400m run, 15 pullups, 50 squats, 15 pullups = 13:30
All pullup sets unbroken.  I'm happy with that.  Next time stronger on the squats.

Thursday travel day = rest day?

I'm going to be out of my patterns for a long weekend and I'm so excited. 
Excited to drop back in on Crossfit Rio Rancho and let them demolish me at altitude, visit friends, and relax. 

Pumpkin/Butternut Cookies & Muffins

Nobody bakes like Mama's.  Today is the feast of the Immaculate Conception, so in honor of my Mama Mary, I decided to bake a paleo treat!   The verdict is out... no one bakes like mamas and I obviously am not a mama.
Ah well.  This is what I did.

At 400 for 15 min.
1 1/2c Pumpkin (I used a pie pumpkin. I just baked it like any other squash, then Pulled out the flesh and mashed it up)
3 tbs agave nectar
1 egg
2 egg whites
1 c. coconut milk
1 c. chopped walnuts

1 c coconut flour
1/2c almond flour
1 tsp baking powder.
2tsp Pumpkin Pie spice
1 tsp cinnamon

They were ok, just dry.  Coconut flour is still hard for me to cook with.  It sucks up all the moisture so I find that I have to double or triple the amount of liquid ingredient to try to make it balance. Almond flour seems much better for baking to me, but it is more expensive.  I've thought about grinding my own, but haven't taken that step yet.

This is what I did the last time that came out so much better, as Muffins actually
1 1/2c  butternut squash
3 tbs agave nectar
2 eggs

1/4 c. coconut milk
3/4 c. chopped walnuts
1c almond flour
1/2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp Pumpkin Pie spice
1 tbs cinnamon
Inspired from Everyday Paleo

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Stuffed Squash

Great Fall Meal
Preheat oven to 350
Cut squash in half (acorn or other)
Pull out the insides.
Place flat side down on baking sheet with water.
Bake 40 mins.
Flip over and stuff with cut apples coated in cinnamon
and ground turkey or breakfast sausage
Bake 20 min longer.


Monday, December 6, 2010

Salad Variation

This is one of my FAVORITE go to's:
Tomatoes, Cucumbers, EVOO, Crushed black pepper
easy peasy!
Add grilled chicken breast = balanced and delightful meal.
World Market sells the best tomato basil flavored oil... mmm.

snuck a few raisins and almonds in this one because let's face it, I'm an addict.

Sunday, December 5, 2010

It takes 2 days

Note to self:  Don't get so excited, or frustrated, about the apparent non-effect of poor dietary choices right away.  Give it 2 days, you will inevitably notice your body is not pleased.

I indulged in the standard munchies provided at my girls' night Friday... processed or baked grains and sugars. Why?  I don't know - depressed apathy.  pride. whatever.
Saturday, I enjoyed my leche chocolata. Whether from that or from my great workouts,  I was euphoric. I topped it off with a cocktail.

Sunday, I felt run down and like I'm getting sick.  I know I'm not sick - My body is just displeased with me.

SUGAR... sugar is my weakness and nemesis.  I have been too dismissive of that and loving the raisins and dates lately too... Ok. I know my enemy and I hope I will be more vigilant.

I have a few vacations coming up soon - a perfect opportunity to 'make an exception'
Let this be my reminder that those exceptions will not come without consequences.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Chocolate Milk?

Yes! Chocolate Milk!

Chocolate Milk: The New Sports Drink?
Check it out. 

Today after the best WOD ever I went for the chocolate milk.... deliciousness.

I waited to see if it would bother my GI system before Workout 2 and....nope! just deliciousness. (I confess to being a little annoyed sometimes that my body doesn't exude intolerance for things I have cut out of my diet. Oh well. That is another topic.)
A while back I watched a series of interviews on crossfit about nutrition.  Boz went around interviewing HQ's trainers and athletes about what they do.
Zone, Paleo, and the "I eat whatever I want" diet from BA Spealler.

I was surprised how many of the athlete's had chocolate milk as their post workout nutrition of choice.  The idea was dismissed of course.  "I'm not allowed to do that. I'm sure there's a better way."   Actually I'm terrible about eating anything post WOD.

I was speaking with a friend just the other day who has recently been to a nutritionist.  She came highly recommended - PhD yes, but also a body builder herself she knows very well the science of our bodies and how foods affect them.  She actually recommended chocolate milk as recovery - it has carbs, proteins, fats for all the nutrients to absorb properly and post workout is the best time to have added sugars or carbs because it's when metabolism is highest.
Maybe, it's not necessarily best for looking the cuttest, but for just recovery and well being. 

I don't think I will make this a daily habit.  I still think it's too much sugar, and that dairy is going to keep a fat layer on me preventing the definition I want, but boy did it make me feel happy today.  I will not feel guilty for make this choice every now and then, particularly on heavy days or double WOD days.


Chicken breast, spinach, mashed sweet potato
Delicious Spinach!

In a skillet:
Carmelize Onions in EVOO
On low heat,
Toss in some sundried tomatoes
Add about 1/8 c Chicken broth
Add a few handfuls Spinach
cover and steam for a few minutes
Top with some crushed walnuts.

Week's Workouts

Pic compliments of CFBD
Monday:  Sick day... pretty much just a warm up: few sqats, jumprope 3 min, muscleup practice etc.

Tuesday: "Annie" 50-40-30-20-10 Double unders & Situps= 8:19 a new PR!! My double unders are back and getting better. It pays to practices skills.

Wednesday: AMRAP in 12 min of 3 deadlift, sprint 100ft or so, 10 one legged squats, 20 double unders, sprint 100ft or so... 5 or 6 rounds I lost count. 
I did 45lbs on the DL while trying to be kind to my back (Rx was like 225lbs, ha!) This is the first time I did one legged squats without holding something for support.  I am very pleased.  My left leg is weaker and I come up on my toes more, but not bad.  I'll take it!

Thursday:  5 rounds 400m run + 7 Dumb bell thrusters = 12:28 
Did this one at home using a treadmill. Only 26lbs DB's (52lb total) on the thrusters. I don't know why I hate dumb bell thrusters, they just feel heavier than the barbell, but they were like butter compared to the run.  I was able to do all sets without breaks.  The breather came getting the treadmill on/off

Friday:  Deadlifts 5x5 = 65, 85, 95, 115,  135 and Front Squats 5x5 = 65, 95, 115, 135, 145.  Tabata ring pushups for extra conditioning = 6 (lowest count) 
A few notes... today was sort of a light day.  I figured I haven't rested this week so it's ok not to do a WOD.  2nd, I haven't been lifting much in the last month, and I want to start bringing it back and testing how I feel.  Since aggitating an old back injury a 2 mos ago, I have been mostly conservative with the weight I've done.  ESPECIALLY on deadlifts.  Today I just wanted to see how it felt and more importantly just to lift some weight.

Saturday:  3 rounds: 10 muscle ups, 10 forward rolls, 20 one legged squats, 20 yd Handstand walk... 19:55  not Rx.
I was so so excited to try this.  Even though I can't do a muscle up nor walk on my hands, I didn't care.  It looked so fun and it's a challenge in the ways I love and I LOVED IT!  I want to do it again and again until I can do it right.
  I did muscle up transitions that were really more like a jumping dip. but on the last round raised the rings over my head for jumping MU's.  front rolls I love!  dizzy dizziness. One legged squats I'm getting better.  I'm just still stoked that I can do them at all! 
Handstand walks have been showing up more and more lately.  I think they will be at the games this year.  I think the farthest I got between falls was 5 hand steps.  I'll take it!  All of it.  I don't care that I was falling all over the ground for this workout.  It was awesome. 

Saturday later:  1 rep max each
Power Clean 125  PR
Bench Press 115 ( think I might have done more if I had a spotter. safety first yo)
Overhead Squat 105  PR

Happy, I feel really happy right now. This was a good week, with a great great fun WOD to finish it off. I'm lifting heavier again... little by little. I think I might just rest tomorrow!

Friday, December 3, 2010

Six Pack Experiment- one month

I've done nothing out of the ordinary in the last month that would help me get better abs.  Just 95% paleo eating and a moderate amount of crossfit.

The tummy has gone ups and down with the gastrointestinal tides and lady bloating.  Actually to give the most fair comparison I should take pics in another 3 days or so; however, just now after a work out and after a few days of deliberate light eating I am feeling skinny and encouraged... so here's the pic.
better? same? worse?

Hmm... maybe the same?  Maybe a little puffier.  Pic's are good for comparing.
I thought this experiment would be strictly "will paleo give me a 6 pack?"  without really changing how I exercise or adding any ab specific work. But if I'm going for a 6pack, then I kind of want to commit to go for it and work for it - not just wait around another 10 months to see if the paleo/primal/eat clean program does it on its own.  Decisions, decisions...

"What about Core?"  There's a crossfit video on it.  Crossfit doesn't do a lot of ab work in the way people usually think of it... situps, crunches, etc.  The core muscles of our bodies are designed primarily for stabilization - so you are really working your core muscles in a functional way when lifting weights, and everything else we do, by stabilizing your midline, i.e. back and abs are contracted, tight and stabilized as you work/lift.  This prevents injury and builds core muscles.

This is what I meant by I'm not going to do anything out of the ordinary. But I actually kind of love traditional ab work.  situps, V-ups, GHDsitups, Lsits, Knees to Elbows and feet to bar, bosu ball work, (flutter kicks I could live without).

I've always been a situp princess.  Actually, a couple months ago a trainer thought it would be a fun warm up to have us do max situps ... He had to cut me off at 600 so we would have time for the work out.  Maybe that's why I'm like a tree trunk in my torso? hmm... I digress.

Since I actually like that stuff, and a six pack is sort of a loose goal I have, I'm considering looking for a 6pack focused program to work on. Looks like I have some research to do.  I'll let you know if I make any progress on that. Really, I think diet is HUGE in looking so cut.  I'll probably just have to stay with paleo and be more conscious about my salt intake.  Wouldn't hurt if I drank pure-er water too.  Just some thoughts.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

It's a girl thing

I've told you that I am all over the place these days.  ONE factor in that is just being a girl.
I have been questioning how much the female cycle really affects us...  In a culture that can be somewhat androgynous, and dismissive of our gender differences, some times I forget or question how much of what I'm feeling is real and how much is just in my head.

Well friends, yesterday morning, right on time, my monthly guest arrived.  I awoke this morning 1.5 lbs lighter, with my measurements coming back toward normal  (36, 29, 31.5, 37.8, 22.5... two inches down compare)... geesh... and I feel worlds better. 

Of course I have been eating very light for 2 days (with the special intention of a safe delivery for my friend. While fasting is good for me. I will not go hungry for my own sake).

But I am certain now, there is definitely something very true and powerful about the rythym of my femininity -
the swelling, water retaining, hormonal genius. 
My food cheats this last month may have made it worse... which is a testiment to the eating clean approach.

It helps to know.

So take heart my lady friends.... there is so much more going on in our bodies than just what foods we are putting in and what exercise we are putting out, while that is very important.  Don't lose heart when you think you've blown all your efforts.  Patience.  Surrender.  Just stay the course.  Peace.  All will be well.

In the meantime, just a word of warning don't google image search 'girls only'... so unnecessary. Really, world?

Wednesday, December 1, 2010


I think it's natural to feel a pull to fast after a feast, and feast after a fast.  In addtion to the primal instinct of facing times of plenty and scarcity as natural, we've also had centuries of feasting before fasting within the religions of the world.

In the Catholic Faith, which is my home, we have fasting seasons of lent and advent, which are proceeded by Mardi Gras and Thanksgiving, and followed by feasting at Easter and Christmas.

These are times to voluntarily go without all the richness and comforts we enjoy every day.  There are SOOO many spiritual benefits to fasting - when we aren't so self sufficiently meeting every comfort we allow God to bless us to show us how much He wants to do in us and for us, to transform us in our emptiness. Because let's face it, when we are full we don't want more. When we are comfortable we don't seek, Every person is inclined to pray more when they are suffering and life is hard than when they have it all picture perfect. Any ways....

A dear friend of mine is expecting her 1st baby... a week ago.  She has been uncomfortable for a long time now.  I decided that I would fast until baby is in her arms.  Fast - meaning go without, deny my wants, as a sacrifice, the grace of which can be applied to her. We are united, and in a way 'bear one another's burdens'.

Having gained 3 lbs and 5 in over the last few weeks, skipping snacks and laying off the paleo treats (raisins, dates, paleofied baked goods) will do me no harm.

In fact, there are actually physical benefits to fasting.  Intermittent fasting shakes up and wakes up our bodies a little bit. Check out the primal view: